valve has a press conference regarding half life 3

everyone is waiting for Gabe Newell

suddenly the ground shakes

a man appears...

a man so fat he's distorting light around him

he's so fat he's literally bending space time

ITT: weird shit you think only you do

Whenever I brush my teeth I put my dick on the sink because it just feels nice and cool against the underside of my weiner and that's just a refreshing feeling that I think most people don't ever really think to try out, but you guys totally should.