#historiezreddita

Me and my gf were both 17 years old. We were fucking, and all of a sudden we heard this sound. It sounded like when you slowly pour water from a glass and onto the carpet.

I stopped. She stopped. (I'm still in her)

The sound just kept going.

After a few seconds I ask, "what the hell is that sound"?

Then, realize the vibration of the bed had pushed over
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#historiezreddita

I have also had kids who somehow manage to leave little rabbit-like turds on the classroom rug. I guess they roll out the pant leg. One year I was able to quickly identify the culprit (apparently his parents didn't make him wear underwear), but there was another year when we kept checking undies and never could figure out who the pooper was. That same year, I had a kid who would
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#historiezreddita

Wypowiedzi o #rozowepaski które jeżdżą na #konie

If you date a horse girl you need to realize that you will never be higher than number 2 in her life.

If you can make it to #2 spot you must be a golden-coated chocolate man who jizzes $100 bills and shits pizza. You're behind her mom, her horse, what her trainer says, barn gossip/politics, acting like she can relate to what country
@Chlaposz_Minetosz: ja myślę, że jeśli już, to pochodna bogatego tatusia. Jak są laski, które zaczęły jeździć same, bo im się to podoba itp. to zwykle są spoko. Najgorzej jak masz pacjentkę, której bogaty tatuś funduje wszystko od golfa, przez narty, po jazdę konną i jej nosek już od najmłodszych lat jest gdzieś pod sufitem. No ale wtedy to arystokratka i konie nie mają z tym nic wspólnego - po prostu to
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@Ayano: tak, półsiad też dobry. Najlepiej na ujeżdżalni, zmieniając pozycję można obserwować raz z przodu (półsiad też "sprężynuje"), a raz z tyłu ( ͡º ͜ʖ͡º)

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#historiezreddita

STORY TIME!
I was drunkenly fucking my ex's ass.
When each time I pulled back, I felt a slight spray.
I look down, and I'm just balls-deep in poo.
Not knowing the proper protocol in this situation: I did was any red blooded man in my situation would do.
I pumped harder till I came.
When I pulled out, my ex proceeded to dump all over the sheets.
You ever see
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